Oh, lovely, lovely cheese. Everything is better with cheese. Except perhaps ice cream but the verdict is still out on that one.

T'other night Lovely Wife made mac 'a cheese. This is not the blue box dinner I speak of. Such prepared cheese like food product is anathema to the palate. No, I speak of true lucious homemade mac 'a cheese, wherein the macaroni serves merely as a vehicle to carry the delicious and savory cheese.

Why is this news, you ask? Because I am the cheese meister of the household. I am the undisputed champion chef for cheesy goodness of the macaroni variety. My mac 'a cheese is of a world class. Check that. My mac 'a cheese is beyond that. There is no mac 'a cheese anywhere, prepared by anybody, that approaches the cheesy perfection of my dish. Mac 'a cheese is way at the top of my comfort foods list. It's created with love and many years of "touch". I make the hell out of mac 'a cheese.

And Lovely Wife was going to attempt to follow my recipe to duplicate my gastronomical perfection? Let us just say that the recipe is...less than detailed:

1. Melt a stick of butter.
2. Pour in some milk.
3. Melt a couple handfuls of cheddar into it.
4. Put in some romano.
5. Add some other cheese.

And she nailed it. Oh, there were some problems, don't get me wrong. Her initial milk pour was far too great, forcing cheese compensation. Consistency was an issue as a result and took some serious tinkering at the tail end in order to resolve it. But the end product, the final grade, was unmitigated success.

Is she good or what?

In the interest of spreading the wealth I've attempted to make a real recipe for all y'all what haven't truly ever enjoyed the sensation of cheese perfection upon your palates. There really is a touch required and I can't give perfect measures since I mostly base the amounts on handfuls and eyeballing quantities but I've done the best I can for you.

1. Use a large sauce pan or medium sized pot.
2. Use low heat.
3. Melt a stick of butter. If you are one of those folks who uses a butter subtitute, use butter anyway. It's way better for you than the polyunsaturated crap in margarine. If you insist, go ahead and substitute your prefered butter substitute but I can't guarantee anything palatable will result.
4. When the butter is melted, pour in about a 1/4 cup of milk.
5. Mix the butter and milk until they blend a bit (this will happen when it has warmed back up to temperature).
6. Add in 2 cups of shredded cheddar cheese and stir occasionally until the cheddar is melted.
7. Check the consistency. If it's too thick add some more milk. A little goes a long way.
8. Add in 1/4 cup of romano cheese and stir occasionally until it is all melted.
9. Check the consistency again. If it's too thick go for some more milk.
10. Add in 1/4 cup of shredded mozzarella cheese and stir until it is all melted and the sauce has a uniform consistency.
11. Did I mention that you should be using a wooden spoon? Seriously, it makes a difference.
12. If you over-milked and the sauce is too runny you can add more cheddar to thicken it back up.
13. Pour the sauce over al dente noodles and mix carefully (so as not to bust up the noodles).
14. The al dente part is important - If the noodles are cooked to the point where they are soft the mac 'a cheese is going to have a nasty mushy consistency. The noodles must be al dente.
15. Any noodle you can eat with a spoon is acceptable. We tend toward the thicker twisty ones or the spirals.
16. Eat and make yummy noises.

POINTS: 2 points to the first person to name my source for the title of this post. No searchy-searchy.